In this post, we’re going to look at how to stop drinking wine.
If you are asking yourself:
“Am I drinking too much wine?”
“Is a bottle of wine per night too much?”
then this blog post is for you.
Wine is typically seen as a more feminine drink. Sure, men drink it. But, the imagery and description of wine is often directed towards ladies.
It’s no wonder, with wines being described as “foxy”, “lively” and “intellectually satisfying”.
Intellectually satisfying. Right…
We’ll be looking at some of the marketing tricks around wine, as well as the “Wine Mom“ phenomena. Finally, and most importantly, we will look at how to stop drinking wine.
“Wine is For Women”
What I’m about to share with you is borderline insane…
Before writing this post, I was doing some reading and stumbled across a liquor store’s blog.
The blog started talking about some scary facts and statistics about alcohol.
Such as alcohol being worse for women because of their metabolism, women being more prone to heart and liver disease, and alcohol consumption “increasing breast cancer by a whopping 15%”. (Source)
The post then makes a DRAMATIC shift.
“Why not switch to wine instead?”
The post then starts talking about the supposed health benefits of drinking wine.
Wait a minute…
It’s the ultimate “bait-and-switch”.
They make you feel really bad about alcohol and its effects. After that, they try to sell you the exact thing they warned about.
Where are this company’s ethics and values?
This is a classic dose of manipulation to get you in an emotional state to buy their fancy packaged poison.
Now they’ve got you in an emotional state, they start listing out 6 “best girly wines” to share with your girlfriends. Wine specifically marketed for women.
It’s no wonder that women reach for the bottle…
Drinking Wine For “Stress Relief”
Many ladies that drink wine say they do it for stress relief. Challenging times at work, children playing up and relationship problems seem to be some of the most common reasons for drinking wine.
And they often describe it as a vicious “cycle”.
So, what does this cycle look like? I asked a member of the Soberclear community.
(If you aren’t already a member, you can join the Soberclear community by clicking here.)
She said a typical routine looked like this:
“I’d wake up hungover from the wine I drank the night before. I’ve never once woke up and felt happy I drank the night before. I’d vow to myself not to drink again.
And, I really meant it.
I’d often find myself pouring away the remaining wine in the house. My anxiety levels were higher than normal and I’d just feel bad about myself.
Typically, I would either read “Quit Lit” books ordered from Amazon, read blogs or watch some YouTube videos about stopping drinking.
Usually, my dry-spell lasted a few days. I’d start feeling good about myself.
However, it never lasted.
I’d have a stressful day at work, or my kids would be driving me mad and I’d end up picking up a bottle in the supermarket. “Stress-relief” I call it.
This cycle repeated for years.”
Cycles like this can be extremely hard to break out of. And, it’s not just her. It’s millions of other women that reach for the wine bottle to “relieve” stress.
Maybe wine does temporarily relieve stress.
However, when drinking wine turns into a compulsive behavior that is consistently stealing your freedom, happiness, and ability to relax, I wouldn’t call it a very effective stress reliever.
Some may argue that it’s actually contributing to stress. But, that’s a story for another day.
The “Wine Mom” Identity
So, millions of women are drinking wine for stress relief. And, if you are reading this article, you might be one of those women.
Next, I want to introduce you to something called “The Wine Mom”.
You may, or may not have heard of The Wine Mom.
A quick Google search reveals:
“The Wine Mom is a middle-aged woman (usually a Mother) that drinks wine and posts about it on social media.”
They post memes like:
“The most expensive part of having kids is all the wine you have to drink” and “Wine is to moms what duct tape is to dads. It fixes everything.”
And, they’ll also post classy pictures of them with their glass of wine, looking all relaxed.
So now we have a highly addictive substance that people are ingraining into their online identity.
Not only are they ingraining it into their identity, but they’re also promoting it as a glamorous and positive lifestyle.
It’s important to remember that social media is just a highlight-reel.
- How many “Wine-Moms” show you what they look like after waking up in the morning hungover?
- How many “Wine-Moms” are talking to you about increased levels of anxiety and depression?
- How about the amount of money being spent on wine instead of her child?
If you ask a Wine Mom why she is a “Wine Mom”, she’ll tell you all sorts of reasons. She’s busy, she works hard and she’s an exhausted parent and they use wine to relax.
These aren’t reasons to drink wine – they are excuses.
Does the wine make the Wine Mom a better parent? Do her problems go away after drinking? If a child is causing stress, does the wine make the child’s behavior or situation change?
And not only that but if that Wine Mom wants to stop drinking, she probably has a few hundred or thousand people that follow her.
It’s become ingrained into her identity – and that’s dangerous.
It normalizes and glamorizes a potentially problematic behavior.
Is the “wine-mom” phenomenon really helping women relax? Or is it just covering up a more sinister problem?
How Do You Stop Drinking Wine Every Day Then?
So, you’ve accepted that you’re drinking more wine than you’d like.
And if you landed on this post, you’re looking for ways to reduce your wine consumption.
We’re going to take a 6 step approach to stop drinking wine.
1. Don’t use willpower
The first step to stopping drinking wine is (probably) something you’ve never heard before.
It’s to not rely on willpower.
Yep, you heard that right – you should not use willpower.
The willpower method is one of the most popular ways to stop drinking alcohol.
I, among-st many other ex-drinkers, tried the willpower method.
And, it works.
However, it doesn’t work for prolonged periods of time. It might last a few days, weeks, or months.
But, there will be days where your willpower is strong and days where it is weak.
Willpower, by definition, is the act of exerting control or restraining impulses.
The trick is to remove the desire to drink in the first place, so you never need to exert control again.
If there is a day that your willpower is weak, your chances of relapsing are high.
2. Change your thinking about alcohol
The next step to stopping drinking is to change the way you think about alcohol.
That means breaking down your current belief patterns around why you drink and replacing them for new beliefs.
It is worth taking some time to examine the reasons why you drink and breaking them down one by one.
This can be done alone, but it may take a lot of trial and error.
If you don’t have the time to do in-depth introspection, then educating yourself is the next best thing.
3. Educate yourself
Educating yourself on alcohol, the conditioning, and the reasons why you drink can be done through introspection.
However, it can be done much faster through education.
This can be achieved through reading “Quit-Lit” books, watching YouTube videos, or reading blogs. Here are a few posts for you to check out after reading this blog:
When you can see alcohol for what it is, that’s when the real change happens.
You stop craving it, and you start getting on with your life.
4. Don’t reduce consumption or attempt to moderate
The next tip is not to attempt to cut back or moderate your drinking.
I recently created a video answering the question of whether or not you can moderate drinking alcohol.
To make a long story short, moderation doesn’t work.
Don’t make the same mistakes I made in the past…
5. Understand your triggers and cravings
Another important thing to do is to understand your triggers.
There are two options here. If you want to learn more about triggers and cravings, you can get my free guide on the 3 Steps To Beat Your Alcohol Cravings by clicking the link in the sidebar. In the guide, we talk about some important lists to create to help understand your cravings and triggers.
Alternatively, you can read this post about How To Stop Thinking About Drinking by clicking here.
6. Don’t quit forever
The final tip on how to stop drinking wine is not to quit forever.
If you make a vow to yourself to stop forever, you are putting yourself in a sense of deprivation.
Instead, work on educating yourself about the truth about alcohol.
I never tell myself “I’ve quit forever”. However, I have absolutely no desire to drink alcohol.
There’s a big difference.
I feel no sense of deprivation, and every day I embrace my new life without alcohol.
Wine is often drunk by women to “relieve stress”.
It’s often ingrained deeply into people’s identities.
The only way to stop is to remove the reasons why you drink through introspection and education. Don’t attempt to moderate, get clear on your triggers, and get moving forward.